In the dusty sands of isreals land
The lord looked down and saw noah
With his wife and children and the love
They had and they praying on their knees
And deserving a gold medal for being good
And then He changed the channel to see
The rest with lovers and haters, killing
Each other with abandon. Men loving
Men and women loving women and
More men and animals eating animals
And drinking liquor and singing and
Dancing and indulging in all manner
of debauchery and hideously fun
And terribly joyful sins
and turning to the spirit
He declared oh holy spirit who once
Was a ghost what should I do to these
People who flaunt the laws of their god.
The holy spirit went silent and thought
Deep and pondered long and declared
“Ask the young lad I’m a bit busy here”
And he went back to drinking wine with
The angels and playing with their fiddles
So god looked upon his son on his left
And asked on to him what shall he do
And the son turned and said
burn the bushes and scare their wits
The lord said no it only made him high
And got them giggling and of no use
so the one on the right got mad
with the disturbance and suggested a flood
A big flood to destroy all in its path.
And god looked down and agreed
A flood son yes a flood of godly
Proportions but I will save two of all
The living species that will go forth
To glorify my wonder
The light awoke noah in his marriage bed
His wife asleep in his arms, the voice
Soft whispered in his ears
Awaken noah and hear my word
I am your lord the ruler of all mankind
You shalt go forward and gather the wood
To build an arc like never seen before and I will
Deliver onto you two of every species one male
One female but we wont be having any of them gays.
With their loving carryon and wanting to be married
You shall Sail upon my flood of death and after 40 days
you and your cargo will go forth to rule and populate
The creation created by your god’s love for you.
And moses looked up to the light and his bones
creaked and he shuttered and on to the lord he
asked with half drunken eyes
“who’s there, get out of the garden and don’t be going on
With such manner of Crazy talk.
And the lord scratched his head and the room
Trembled and thunder roared and noah fell to his
knees in believe and the light
Faded from his presence. And the wife clattered him
For waking her before the alarm went of.
He set forth With his sons upon his mission
Well apart from timmy who was studying
Accountancy and may not be eligible for transport on
Account of his fondness for boy bands and such like
He began beating nails into wood and spreading tar
Over planks and constructing a mighty
Arc fit for a diety or a king or a nation
Of horny couples of animals and beasts,
Ugly men of poor taste and hairy women of low morals
The locals laughed and his sons sweated
And his wife went half demented and
His daughters prayed for peace and
tranquillity. Then in the month of May
As flowers bloomed and the birds sang
They nailed the final nail. God descended
On a cloud and called all the animals
Forth and he shouted at noah to get up
Out of the bed quick and open the door
And the animals went in two by two.
There was elephants and kangaroos
Tigers and monkeys too and grey
Hippos and snakes that were blue.
They all marched and crawled and slithered
Into that big auld arc as the waters started
To fall and rise upon the land and the doors
Were shut and the people ran to noah for help
And he wept as the lord said no let
Them drowned, I shall kill them all, millions
Of them will perish for those sins like
Scratching themselves too vigorously
of a Sunday morning and eating bull meat of a Friday
And the earth shook with the screams of
Drowning people and animals who did nothing
Worse than been born at the wrong time and
A flotilla of babies with innocent smiles
Floated on merciless waters of death
A gencide of godly Proportions .
On gods right the son cried and wrote
His dreams upon a tablet of stone
To love thy neighbour as thyself and do onto
To others like I would do onto you. On the
Left the spirit shuddered with the weight of
So many souls all at once knocking at the
Gates which had been locked since Adam ate
The juicy looking apple from the tree of
Knowledge and was left short changed
With he learning feck all only that woman
Knew everything from cradle to tomb
And god looked at the pair of them and
He wondered where he had gone wrong
And as the screams of the multitudes
Echoed from the fires of hell, the devil
Could be heard laughing and god decreed
That the gates should be opened and on
A cross with his blood draining and in mortal
Agony his son would earn the key.
And the son fainted and the holy spirit
Wished he was beyond the gates Down below
where the party had descended into full swing
The abandoned souls in flames of singing
and laughing and dancing and loving
And all manner of debauchery and fun
On the arc the dream descended into a
Nightmare as the sea rocked and sun boiled
And the animals feed their hunger with
Other animals. The tigers eat the goats. The
Lions ate the sheep . The kangaroos bounced
Into the elephant who panicked and
Laid waste to feasts of the rest and mayhem
Ensued and noah panicked and the waves
Continued to rise and the rain continued
To fall and the smell below was putrid
And blood flowed and then it stopped.
The rain stopped the animals stopped
And god called onto noah to bring forth
The inheritors of paradise and noah
Fainted and his wife abandoned ship
And then there was silence and once
More the plan had failed and the devil
Laughed and god scratched his head
And with a wave he woke the animals
From death and away they ran two
By two and everyone sang hurrah hurrah.
Francie McGivney 06.05.15
